I'm sat here on our balcony at the moment, thinking about a bunch of stuff. As I am writing this on the last days of my maternity leave (yeah, I don't usually have time to sunbathe on our balcony) and by the time this post goes live I'm already back at work. Either way, I thought a lot about one simple question; "do we encourage the people around us enough?" And mainly, "how long can you keep encouraging people without receiving anything back?". These are the main questions I am writing about to you today.

Encouragement is a powerful thing. It makes you believe in you. It makes you believe in you through others opinions. It makes you feel comfortable with yourself. It makes you feel worthy. It makes you feel like someone actually cares about you and what you want to do in life. Like someone gots your back. And the encouragement you keep getting outside of your head, makes you encourage yourself as well. It gives it a boost.

Some people might need outer encouragement, some might not.
How many times your boss has said to you, "You're great at what you do, keep doing what you do"?
How many times your parents have said to you, "You're great at what you do, keep doing what you do"?
How about your friends, do they ever say "You're great at what you do, keep doing what you do?"
I've heard that sentence once, and that was my former boss who said so. Our new boss doesn't seem to give a crap about encouraging us, who ended up with him after the co-operation negotiations.

Do you encourage your fellow ones at school or work?
Do you tell your children you've got their back, do you tell them that they're good at what they do?
Do you tell your friends that they're good at what they do?
I do, encourage my son mostly. Other two, I haven't done so often.

Do we encourage the people around us enough?
I don't think we do. In my culture, it's said that a Finn is willing to pay 100€ so that his neighbour won't get 50€. And that applies to this as well. But what I really believe, is that as down to Earth we might be, we are secretly jealous of others successes. I also believe, that we could be happy for others if we set out minds to it and we could be able to encourage other people without thinking it's out of our own pockets if we set our mind to it.
But like most of the changes, this is also the one that I firmly believe our next generations will change. No, I actually believe that us Millenials have planted the seed of a thought about it and it'll pass on to the next generation and perhaps we could be less jealous to each other in the future.

Like bringing people down, encouraging as well is a lot easier to do online. I can type out under someone's tweet "you're going to smash it! I know you are! xx" without a second thought about it. I can also type a text to my friend, that everything will go absolutely fine. I can say out loud to my son that he's doing so well at what he's doing. I can say to my husbands face how proud I am of him when he achieves something. But I've not always been like that. I used to seek for encouragement before giving it to someone else.

What if we keep encouraging people without getting anything back?
Then it's time to stop. You don't have to spend your time and energy on people who are more willing to seek for the encouragement, instead of encouraging you back. Life is too short for that kind of BS. It doesn't mean you can't have anything to do with that person anymore though, just reduce the encouragement level. It's not something people is usually purposely seeking, I think it's an unconscious thing.

Most of all, do it for yourself.
You know how good it makes you feel when someone encourages you. Why not share the good feeling around? And when you can make someone else happy, you can be happy about that. It's not rocket science just like sprinkling kindness around isn't a weakness or doesn't cost a thing.

A little challenge.
Today, I'm challenging you to encourage three people in your life. Tell them how much you value them. Tell them that it's all going to be alright. Tell them how much the work they do, matters.

Have a happy day encouraging others! And remember, what goes around - comes around.



  1. This feels so apt for me today!! I tend to have a very encouraging nature and I find that I always engage with friends and other bloggers, often making the effort to reach out to them. But recently I’ve noticed that there are a few key people in my life that seem to be deliberately ignoring me or not reciprocating my encouragement and it hurts. I’m still not sure how I’m going to handle it moving forward, but this post has been very uplifting this morning! Charlie xo

  2. Whitney Kutch24/8/18 8:11 pm

    Encouragement is so important! You never know how much even the smallest, nice comment can positively affect someone!

  3. This is the kind of message I love to have to start a day. I like to encourage other people, it's a positive thing that gives a positive impact to others. I realize though, some people are just for the words of encouragement, as you mentioned it too, without any willing to give back the same.

  4. I feel like I was just having this conversation with my mom about encouragement and it can effect us. This is a great post. Have a wonderful day!

  5. This is something I aim to achieve I really try hard to encourage and lift people up but sometimes dont get anything back .. you are right we should really be there for ourselves too ... I enjoyed the breakdown on this

  6. This is definitely something I've been trying to make a more concerted effort at. I love the idea of Shine Theory -- as in, I don't shine if you don't shine. I want to encourage all my pals to shine so that we all do!


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