What is rheumatoid arthritis actually?
Rheumatoid arthritis is a chronic joint disease. It's not infectious even tho some people at my school first thought so when I was diagnosed with it. 
Reasons why people are diagnosed with this disease are unknown, but they've made research about things that are effecting for things that cause rheumatoid. 
These things are smoking, especially with men and it can also be inheritable. 
 For me, it effects mostly to my knees but I've noticed some pain in my fingers if I'm spending a lot of time writing with my computer. 
Rheumatoid arthritis can be controlled with eating, exercise and medication like the one's I used (Trexan & acid folic combination).
If the joint becomes inflamed, it's treated with cortisone. 

My little brother tends to cheer me up when I'm feeling sad, not that he would know anything about the stuff I'm going through but he's there. This picture is also super out of context in this blog post.

So why does having the rheumatoid arthritis sucks? 


If I'm trying to hold an object very tightly in my hands, I can't press it hard. That means that I'm basically unable to do pull ups, because my hands pressing force is so minimal that I can't hold myself up with my hands. 


Because the problem is with my knees, they're becoming a huge pain in the ass by just being there. If I stand or walk for too long, they're aching really bad. 
That means that if I once had a dream of becoming a professional dancer, I don't have it anymore. Dancing needs legs, mine doesn't work. 


If my knee joint becomes inflamed, the pain is insane. I can't walk, I just roll around the apartment trying to find me some pain killers. I proved it earlier today about an hour before writing this post. It doesn't feel good. Also, my right side knee is almost 3 times bigger than on the left side. 
Cold, uplift and compression huh? Well, it helps a little.


When I was on my rheumatoid medication I got fat. Yes, I know this is a bit superficial because it's health we're talking about - but after I read what medication can do to my body, it doesn't feel like that anymore. I did research on my own about the medication I was designated with and I found out that it contains ingredients that can have a negative impact for my future. 
You know, having babies and stuff so it didn't take long for me to figure out what for that acid folic was because acid folic is a really important thing when trying to get pregnant or being pregnant.


This is not like a chicken pox you get when you're 5-years-old and you never have to suffer from it again. 


This means that I'm getting flu and other stuff easier, because my immune system basically is attacking against my own cells. Becoming inflamed easier, because my immune system is destroying the wrong cells. 


Which basically means that because my medication is so rough stuff, it can destroy the foetus at any time. So if I ever get pregnant, it's going to be hard and a painful journey. For my knees, because of gaining weight and after using medication that basically hurts my wombs fertility.
It still doesn't mean that I won't be able to have babies, I am and it's kind of a relieving thing to know. And who knows, when the time someday (not very soon) comes, it might not be painful or difficult at all. 

This was just a little info package about the stuff I've been going through with my life earlier and now that my knee is aching pretty badly, I think I have to set an appointment for my doctor after three "healthy" quiet years. I've been suffering this for 9 years now and it sucks but I'm kind of used to it. It has become the part of who I am and if I'm feeling any pain I know when to calm down.
Especially at work where I need to walk all the time and everywhere, when I'm in a lot of pain I sit down, breathe and try to do my work while sitting. 
Easier said than done.



  1. you two are so cute! I wish you the best lovely!


  2. It's so bad and not a lot of people talk about it but there's so many sides to it - unbearable pain, feeling down and just like you can't do a lot!

    Wishing you all the best hun, take care of yourself, go to spa days and make sure you try treatments like going to pools with true sea water and heat which help your body to feel better!

    Layla xx


    1. I think this is one of the things people should talk more often because it's getting more common nowadays and it's really important to understand what kind of a pain someone can go through everyday. When I'm saying that my knee hurts, it really does hurt and it's not basic wining about a rough work day - some people don't understand and that's why I felt the need to write this post.
      Loved your amazin comment, thank you so much for your wishes and I really would like a spa day sometime soon hahah. Or vacation in somewhere warm :D

  3. My cousin has this and I understand fully. Very intimate post. <3

    1. Yes it is indeed, I had the need to publish my thoughts about this because day by day it's touching more people around the world - not just in Finland. People don't talk about it at all and think that it's something that only old people does have. Awful truth is that almost 1 out of 100 16-year-olds get diagnosed with this disease only in Finland. Can't imagine what the numbers are around the world. I wish nobody had to feel that pain it comes along with.
      Best wishes for your cousin <3

  4. I also have rheumatoid arthritis, and I completely agree with everything you've listed here! It's somewhat comforting to know another young person who has it, because usually it only happens in older people, so when I first got diagnosed, I felt really alone and strange. Thank you for sharing a bit of your story, and I hope you find some relief soon!

    1. I'm glad that this post helped you not to feel so lonely:-) for me it was awful to get diagnosed at a very young age (12), because few people at my class first thought it was something they were diagnosed with it too because they could get it from me. That's not how it goes.
      It's sad that there's not enough conversation about rheuma with younger people.

  5. This was such an interesting read! Your little brother is super cute, bless him for cheering you up! :) <3

    Jess xo | The Indigo Hours

  6. My sister in law suffers from this, Thank you for airing your story

    1. No problem at all, tell her my wishes:-)

  7. Oh my goodness that truelly sucks! I am so sorry, specially because you can't dance anymore. I woulnd't know how I would be without it!

  8. My dad was diagnosed with RA this past year. He can't hardly work due to the pain. It's in his elbows and fingers, which is what he uses the most in his line of work. I'm sorry you have to deal with this, because honestly, it sucks!

    1. Yaiks, the pain on my knees is unbearable but I can't even imagine how it will completely feel on fingers. That must be awful. I wish him all the best x

  9. RA is brutal! so frustrating at times even when its not brutally painful!

    1. That's absolutely true! It's frustrating when you still are going to wonder that what if I'll be in such a huge pain after this. Even it's something like going to buy food or something.

  10. Such a difficult thing to live with, but it''s so nice to see someone talk about things frankly and honestly.

    1. People really should talk about these things more often:)


Thank you so much for taking an effort to comment on my blog♥
Also, make sure to leave your links so I can visit in yours♥