Sunday, March 26, 2017



I can't believe that our little bundle of joy is 1-month-old today. Imagine, we've managed to keep a baby alive for one whole month. Okay, just kidding. Keeping a baby alive is not quantum physics. Just keep him fed, change his diapers, keep him in clean clothes, talk to him and spend time with him when he's awake and when he falls asleep just keep checking on him every five minutes so he won't stop breathing. Wait, what? Okay, sarcasm on that last one is going strong, but with all the things I said before I was serious. We've had such a fun first month!

Dino is such a personality. I mean, he definitely has my temperament and oh boy he's a bit difficult when he decides to be. He's calm like he's father but like his mother, he goes nuts if something isn't right. The first couple of weeks he hated diaper changing and wearing clothes. That was the worst thing he knew there was, now he's settled and realised that he feels so much better with a clean and dry diaper and warmer with clothes on.

He also lets us know very clearly when he's hungry. Either he's screaming his lungs out or he's screaming his lungs out. There's nothing in between. That's actually the only time of the day he screams. He screams when he wants his milk. Otherwise, like I said he's super calm.

He's also super interested in his surroundings. Especially about the black and white world map, we're having on our bedroom wall. He could stare at it for ages. I guess he'll be a proper traveller when he grows up. Also, TV is super interesting - even though I need to admit that I've given him too many minutes in front of it. He likes to watch ice hockey, that makes him calm when waiting for his bottle.
Interesting, will he become a travelling hockey player? Who knows.

The nurse said that his motoric skills are super developed for his age. I mean, he was 4 days old when he started lifting his head up and two-week-old when he accidentally rolled from his stomach to his back. He should really slow down his growing process, I wasn't ready for this.

Nights are rolling smoothly. Dino wakes up two times per night, then we change his diaper and feed him. Although, now he have started doing this thing that he thinks is super fun but we really don't appreciate it; he wakes up at 3-4 AM to be fed and for a diaper change and stays awake for an hour or an hour and a half. That kind of annoys me in some way. Dude, can't you see - it's dark, it's night now. He also spends his days mostly awake and when he's awake, he doesn't stand the idea of hanging around somewhere else than in my lap when J's at work. Once, I tried to eat while he was taking his nap. At the very second I took a fork in my hand he woke up and made a scene about it.

After all,  this month has been interesting. It has been all about getting used to the new way of living and new daily rhythms. It has been such a roller coaster, to be honest. But so far, it has been one of the greatest roller coasters of my life.


Dino is wearing: 
body - Polarn O'Pyret
pants - H&M
socks - H&M

Friday, March 24, 2017


I'm not able to breastfeed my son and that's okay. 

Breastfeeding, that funny old thing.

Before I got pregnant and when I actually managed to get myself pregnant I had a plan to breastfeed my future kid at least for six months. I had read all about the benefits of breastfeeding and of course, it creates a special bond between you and your kid. I was ready to do whatever it takes to make it work. Although I knew it wasn't working for everyone, so I didn't take any pressure of making it work. I had a plan, whether it was working or not - I made a decision to be okay with it.

When Dino got around (did you see our birth story over here?), we started practising breastfeeding over at the hospital. First night went well, but the second one was absolute hell. I noticed that my baby was starving and for some reason each time I asked a help from the midwife at night they just placed me on my side and placed my boob in Dino's mouth. His sucking wasn't working, I didn't get any milk out of me and the fact that my boobs are naturally enormous I felt that the position was dangerous for the baby. Even at one point, I asked from the midwife if the baby could suffocate if I'm not holding my breast with my hand while the baby tries to eat and what she answered to me, was the final thing that got me feel absolutely awful about myself.

"Your breasts are so huge that of course, he's going to suffocate."
- Thanks.

After Dino had screamed and cried for his hunger for almost 5 hours that night, someone brought me a little bit of extra milk. The baby got his stomach full and I felt bad about myself.

So, why did I feel bad about myself even though I was ready to face the fact that breastfeeding might not work for everyone?

Because all the conversations on the Internet
are about how breastfeeding is the best and
the only way to provide food for your baby.

Because of each time, if you accidentally mention
that your baby is fed with the baby formula,
you're automatically doomed as a bad mum.

 Because the midwife told me I could accidentally kill
my baby because my breasts are so huge.

When we got home from the hospital, we tried breastfeeding again. It's told that because the hospital environment is super stressful at the times (oh, I can tell that) the milk might not rise there already. We also bought few decilitres of baby formula, just in case and for the fact that the baby won't starve to death. We tried and tried and it just wasn't working.

Our nurse from the maternity clinic visited us at home when we had been home for a couple of days after the time at the hospital. She taught us new feeding positions and told me that there's no way I could kill my baby.  It worked out and things started to look a bit brighter in the breastfeeding life. There was just one but. None of those positions were ones I could do by myself. I needed another person to help me to feed my baby. So if there's anything new to list in my "5 reasons why having big boobs suck" post, it's the fact that it's almost impossible to breastfeed. And no, I'm not talking about double D's here, I'm talking about the breasts of the size of mini watermelons. My breasts have always been that one thing I hate in my body, that have made my self-esteem fall down the cliff and now I hate them even more. The fact that the size of my boobs is making me not to be able to breastfeed my son didn't really lower my self-esteem because it's already as low as it can be over that department.

I know that breastfeeding is the best thing you can provide for your baby, but I'm not able to do so. I've also accepted the fact that breastfeeding is not an option for us. For me, the most important thing is that my baby will have a full stomach and he's healthy growing little star. So far, everything has been fine with eating and our boy is a happy little monkey.

For other mum's struggling with breastfeeding for reason or another, don't blame yourself. It's not always working with everyone. Not breastfeeding your baby does not make you less of a mum than you already are. When living in a world where breastfeeding is made to be the must thing to do for your baby, it's easy to fall into despair especially when the importance of it is thrown inside the doors and the windows from the beginning of your pregnancy.

I'm not saying that baby formula is the best thing for your baby, I'm saying that if you can't provide anything better for the baby, that's the option you're left. And when you're left with that, it's the best for your baby. I hope you catch the idea here.

Our new nurse over at the maternity clinic has been so supportive with this whole baby formula thing. She said that it doesn't matter what the baby eats, because he'll get the food from somewhere, as long as I am comfortable with the decision not to breastfeed my son.

And I am.

After all the struggles, all I want that my baby is fed.
No matter if the milk comes from the bottle instead of my breasts.


Wednesday, March 22, 2017



Just to let you know, having a baby in Winter is pretty interesting. You'll get that wake-up call a month before your due date and realise that it actually is; Winter. Winter means that it's cold outside. Winter means that there's snow outside and the snow outside means that oh, baby it's cold outside. That's something that didn't cross our minds before at the end of the January, sounds pretty ridiculous now when thinking about it later - but at the end of the January, I started to look for snowsuits for babies. Guess what? There wasn't any. Why? Because Spring collections had arrived and all the small sizes had already sold out or there just wasn't any because yeah, the Spring collections have arrived to everywhere. 

So, I started googling for different options and that's how I came across this adorable Baby's Only Footmuff Maxi-Cosi warm bag for the safety seat. It looks great and it's pretty useful when thinking about it. You know, during the Winter it's absolutely wonderful for car drives and shopping purposes. Just put your baby in the warm bag and you're good to go. There's no need to wrap the baby with seven layers of clothing for a long car ride or little food shopping trip - just put the baby in the bag and if it gets hot in there, open the bag. Gosh, I love that thing, not to mention how easy it is to leave the house quickly when you can put your baby in the bag and head out. 

At this point, I should probably mention that this is not a sponsored post because I feel like I'm starting to sound like I'm selling these. No, I'm just way too excited about how convenient this bag is. It makes life so much easier. 

Above, you'll see how it looks inside. The baby can still be strapped in, even though the bag is there - which obviously is a good thing. Wouldn't want to see a flying baby in a bag in a car accident. (Okay, that joke was a bit lame, I'm just going to leave it there.) 

It's just absolutely wonderful. I'm in love. 

Monday, March 20, 2017


Confirmation party
- Evangelic Lutheran tradition.
When you're 15-year-old and if you're a part of the church, you go to confirmation camp/school and learn stuff like the Ten Commandments (which no one really remembers after the whole thing) and Heavenly Father prayer. If you pass, you get your wine and bread and you're blessed. In a nutshell. It's an Evangelic Lutheran tradition. Believer or not, most of the Finns who are part of that religion go there and learn those things. I went there too, seven years ago. Holy shit that was a long time ago. All I can remember is that the camp had the most delicious bread I've ever eaten. 

We're not crazy religious family. Or well, we're not religious at all. My grandmother goes to church every Christmas and myself and mum are finding excuses not to go there.  That's all our family invests in these things. Then again, we are part of the church just because we are. In real life, we don't give a shit about those things. With all the taxes we pay for the church, we're basically paying our spots at the graveyard. And well, having the wedding at the church because it's kind of cool.

I mean, I heard that my uncle scrolled through his phone at the church and when the people were supposed to get up, he didn't. Or well, at least at that very second. Oh my, we had a good laugh with that. He's so freaking funny dude.

Anyways, we got to spend a weekend over at my mum's place and it was so much fun. Dino had his first long car ride (2,5 hours) and everything went well. I mean, he slept the whole way there and back so it was pretty chill. When we were coming back he had moved in such a weird position on his car seat so I was a bit worried if he's going to survive (what was I thinking, of course, he survived) but we got home safely.

We also got to go to sauna together with J after two weeks not being together alone and that was pretty amazing. I mean, with a baby you're never alone. He's there, all the time. That's nice and all, but it's also great to have some 'alone' time together with the other half.
Oh, and I almost forgot! My mum & grandma looked after Dino through the whole night so we got to get a good night sleep after two weeks. I was a bit worried how Dino will survive and I had a trouble getting sleep but when I saw him in the morning I noticed that I had been on my "nervous mummy" mode through the whole night for no reason.

The party went fine and it was so nice to see all the relatives I don't get to see that often. Although, most talked topics were Dino, sleeping and not getting any sleep, diapers and my pregnancy weight gain and how my belly is completely gone and I don't look like I gave a birth couple of weeks ago.

On Saturday when we arrived, we went to Puuvilla shopping centre and I found that pretty bodysuit with a bow for Dino for the party. He was such a handsome little fella!
And we also took our traditional selfie picture with my little brother, damn - when did he grew up?


Sunday, March 19, 2017



I finally got my hands on this shaving soap I wanted to try out for ages! How? Well, J got it for Christmas for me. I'm so happy it was in stock when he was making the order because every time I tried to place it in my shopping basket - it was always out of stock. 

I need to start by saying that I'm not that good at shaving my legs. I mean, I've never owned a proper shaving gel not to mention a shaving soap so I had no expectations when I first tried this out. After few uses, I was sure I had found the perfect shaving soap. Although, I've got nothing else to compare it to, but this is definitely one I'm going to keep in my pampering routine essentials. 

It smells so good. It includes strawberries and its scent is quite strong and I definitely love everything about strawberries. Oh my goodness, Summer is getting closer and closer and that means that strawberries are getting closer and closer. How many times it's appropriate to use the word "closer" in one sentence? 

This one leaves my legs to feel so silky, smooth and moisturised. I absolutely love this. 

Have you ever tried this out? 

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